"Fruit Flavored Water Beverage"

What an odd way to describe a Capri Sun.

I love our password. It's been a month and nine days since we discovered our little diamond in the rough, Shari Elf. What a good person, really. You know what I still think is funny? Those sunglasses, aha. I started thinking about them today and once again had uncontrollable laughter. Ah, someday Auds, you will laugh right along.

You'd be proud of me. I took very good notes in APUSH today. I was surprised. I wouldn't let anyone sit in your seat, aha. (Just had a phantom vibration!) I'm sorry I didn't show up today to watch good movies. I was very productive at school though. Let's have a good movie night sometime soon. And I'll still make you soup, even if you are better. I think that would be nice. We also need to make a huge fort with blankets and such. I love making those, and sleeping in them. They are so fun.

My sister is in such a bad mood today, and I slipped an "I love you," note under her doorway but she just told me to go away, and I guess that's okay, I just hope she gets feeling better.

We all hold the world on our shoulders, really. Everything comes around, just in different ways, and I don't know anybody who isn't empathetic to absolutely no one. Sure, it's kind of sad that we've got just this whole other load of emotion we never really asked for, but you know, I lik it. If I can take a little bit off of everyone, that kind of means that they are giving me a little piece of them, and who are we but who we know and what we've been through, and just, I don't know, when you start feeling someone else's emotion, I just think that is one of the greatest thing in the world, despite what you are feeling.

Yes, definitions of waste do very, but really, I don't get how people consider enjoying yourself 'wasting time.' Maybe, when you are suppost to be doing something else (dang deadlines), but like, isn't being happy what it's all about? I'm so confused about that right now. I just don't know.

The Ragpicker And The Ticketmaster, Pt. II
It was about noon and the winter sun was nowhere to be found, but people were. It was Christmas season, and despite the fact that A Christmas Carol: The Musical was opening that night, there simply were no customers that day. The Ticketmaster gets sidetracked easily, and decided to take a stroll and maybe come back around three (the supposed rush, that never really was a rush). While passing an overturned cart, she casually looked to her side and there she saw a Ragpicker (although you may think the term ragpicker is terribly old-fashioned, I do not believe old-fashioned is terrible) and this Ragpicker looked familiar, but she could not quite put her finger on it.

To be continued, and maybe you will write the next paragraph.

Sometimes I feel like that, though. Simply, I am the good enough. You know, you see these people on the news and they are doing so much good in the world, and you read about them in books, or just hear really nice comments about someone's friend and you are just like "Wow, I wish I could do that," or "I wish I could be more like them," and to be honest I just do not feel like I've been good enough lately. So many complications.

My poor head. I've got one of those headaches in the temple, and it pulses for good measure, I suppose. I've got too much work to do for this to happen, but as I'm learning over and over, I have almost absolutely no control. I really don't like that.

Act like me, hm? No, I'm not courageous in the least bit. Although, I am good at keeping a level head. Occasionally. Maybe being almost insane is simply a part of the charm and charisma I obviously possess? Kidding, kidding. The last time I really screamed was summer. I love summer, I really, really, do. So many adventures. Spring Break, camping, Auds. Get psyched.

I will make you cool band-aids then. Oh, the possibilities. Isn't it weird how we call tissues kleenexes and bandages band-aids simply because of the association with the brand?

Your awkwardness and large pupils will never leave. You are who you were who you will be. Always and forever, Auds.

I love the Fiery Furnaces, really. You know who else I love? TV on the Radio, really. I think I'm having a sugar rush in the worst sense. I had Lucky Charms, grilled cheese, and a Capri Sun for dinner. Not the healthiest? Ah, I have to start getting ready for tennis. I am ready, though.

You know what's weird? Flying objects at night, that you really don't know what they are. Talking about something then totally forgetting what you were saying. Doing math equations in your head. And understanding Latin, for a little bit. (Which is what I did today.)

Without chaos, sure, things would be different, but it'd be relieving for a little bit. That's what I want, just a little relief. I love our school too. I love how you can start a "Down By The Banks" tournament whenever, how you can change in the middle of the bathroom and no one think anything of it, and how many different people there are to make friends with.

I really want one of those good movie days now. It'd be nice not to think of anything else. Please, Auds?

I hope you are feeling better, really. Being sick is a horrible thing and you have all people should not have to deal with it.

The school needs me? Oh, Auds, no.

That's exactly how I feel. It's going much, much, much too quickly and I'm enjoying it too much for it too. It's already almost the next year, it's gone by so fast! It's funny, how at the beginning of the year, you like where you are and you have no idea where you will be. For me atleast, things have changed so much, but in a way things are coming together, in ways I like or not, regardless.

I like cliches too, no matter what people say about them. They make sense, that's why they are there. They prove how everything is connected. I think once more people start realizing that, that we are all connected, I truly do believe we could have peace.

That's kind of sad. That we haven't figured out our passions yet. I get jealous of people that already do. But then again, maybe mine or yours is an acquired taste? I don't know. I think something you are passionate about will kind of have an instant click or feeling about it. Maybe I am totally wrong, maybe that's why I am missing out.

If only people would start understanding, period. I'm really growing weary of ignorance. Really, I jsut don't understand how people can be so mean or dislike this or think this is wrong when it's just so obviously not right to be so cruel. I just don't get it. And I wish I could, because maybe then I could stop being so danged sensitive and this is such a rant and it's going to stop here.

Someone just called my phone for Aleesha?

No, really, Auds, you are helping me get my grades up, and as much as I make fun of you, I am really thankful for it. I've never done so well in school, except for in elementary school, aha. It's nice, or, I don't know, different, in the best way possible. Really, Auds, thanks. So what is the deal with Health? Do you know what I have to do?

I totally believe that. Goodness is in control. Really, I've thought about that so often and it's awesome to know you have thought about it too. I wonder where it all comes from, our thoughts and such. How we can picture things in our head and words and ah, it's just so crazy. I think everyone, really, is good, and we naturally know what is good (somehow) but we have bad things in us. I hate using the word 'things' but I don't know where it all came from, but really, I believe how you are judged on how good you are is, yes, in control.

I might be a paige at the new library. I'm excited. I would love that job.

I always wonder if the things I write on my own, what they make other people feel. Though, it's like they are so personal and I'm not one to put myself out there, so I just keep them to myself, but who knows. Anyways, I really, it's just fascinating once again that you can feel what other people are feeling. I love it. I love people.

No, if I didn't have deadlines, I would do everything better, I believe. I naturally like to do things, and deadlines, they just stress me out. Especially with art. But that's the way it is. Auds, I'm not going to drop out of high school and I specifically said that, aha. Really, I like school. Oddly enough it's getting easier. Hm. I like knowing things, and learning, too. You know there will never be an end to the Ragpicker and the Ticketmaster, Auds. Don't lie to yourself, even if it's for temporary content, aha.

Ah, NEXT THURSDAY DON'T MAKE PLANS! Mel (the woman who I've been talking to on the phone from Invisible Children) is coming to town and having a party thing for everyone here and we get to see unseen footage and stuff, and ah, I'm psyched! I just called you to tell you about it but you are at your sister's recital, so just kidding?

Some guy was video taping you? Aha, oh, I bet that made a really good video to show the family. I always do that. I randomly take pictures of other people and just look at them. Golly, really, people are just so fascinating.

My fingers are randomly really cold and I want to know what percentage of time I spend in my school uniform.


You are always truly mean to me, Audrey. It's quite a fact, aha. "Baby, why ya' gotta be so mean?"

I love the human brain and I love human body and I like humanity, period. I just want to really know everybody. I wonder if people think that I am really nosey. I wonder if I really am. I'm just really interested. I just want to know, I guess. Hm.

Off to homework!

"Cause everything it must belong somewhere
Just like the gold around her finger or the silver in his hair
Yeah, everything it must belong somewhere
I know that now, that's why I'm staying here
I know that now, that's why I'm staying here..."
I love this song, so, so much.