my Bonnie lies over the sea..." Why is that song stuck in my head? Why do I actually like it? I am still cold from our TWO snowball fights. My feet are kind of wet. I'm thinking I'm going to go take a shower after this. Since I can't call you tonight, what else will I do?
I think people would love if you started giving hugs like that, Auds. Really, you are an amazing hugger for having so little experience. You should share that. I already hug people like that, all the time. It's probably old news from me. That is weird how some people can do some things and some can't. I never really thought about that. I've always had the mindset that anyone can do whatever they want, but really they can't. Well, maybe they can? It depends on how intimidated they are by public opinion and what they want to guess I do. It's crazy, all the different things people want to do. There are SO many just, well, differences. I love it.
We will see how long it takes untill I get my family to hate you. JK!
The paragraph with the humbers just about killed me. OH NO! I CAN'T CALL YOU AND ALGEBRA HOMEWORK IS DUE TOMORROW! Ah, Auds, I hate you. No, I don't. Dang it. Hopefully I will do alright. I will, what am I talking about? I wonder if there is a constant number in my life, like 23. I have never seen that movie though. Just the very beginning.
Okay, so why wasn't today Game Day in homeroom? Was I even in homeroom? Yes, yes I was. Man, sometimes I space out so bad! I'm excited to verse you in Disney Trivial Pursuit though, someday. You will have HARD competition, begging for mercy. Oh, yes, it will be very intense. Mucho intenso. Okay, so I made that up.
Ahaha, I would just love everyone's reactions if your biography was published. "Awe, the Ragpicker and the Ticketmaster." Ahah, I can't believe I got suckered in to that job! I just can't take it, it is too much, aha. This school owns my life. It has found it's way into every nook and cranny. It's REDICCC. Ah, but I love it.
Will you please put me on the Brownsburg Public Library calling list? I'm serious, Auds. I have to hear this script and voice that you speak of.
Why would you say it's mine when I gave it to you, Auds? No more "Thanks, it's Abby's,From now on, it's just "Thanks," and then a humongus hug. There you go. I hope you did enjoy your Rally's today. I was sort of nervous, because it's kind of what I live for.
I wonder if I will someday just be able to think clearly. I'm very jumbled lately, and I hate it. It's annoying. My space-out's are getting more frequent and longer, and I am losing the little sense of time I had before. I just have no idea about anything anymore. Gar. It's rather obnoxious really.
My Great Clips haircut is bad, we all know it, okay? Ahaha, I like having a funny haircut though. It 1} makes other people feel better about their hair, 2}makes me and everyone else laugh, and 3} my hair getting as annoying and in-my-face as before is now something to look forward to. So there's THREE silver linings to this rainy cloud that is my haircut. Ah, I know you are joking. I don't take well to actual insults. AKA Travis' life. Really, he is just so hurtful! And serious! I do not understand him at all. It's frustrating.
Ahaha, YES! WE WILL NOT TELL ANYONE! It'll just happen. Oh, yes, yes, YES! I am so psyched for this. I love secret plans and playing spies! One of my favorite games, no lie. This is going to be great, really. We can sketch out our plans and make blueprints and everything. This is serious buisness. Especially since this is the first time your hair is going to be dyed. Oh, Lord!
Sometimes, Auds, I am absolutely deficient. I go parallel to everything I know I should be doing, and I have a really good sense of what I should be doing.
That would be awesome to get all A's. That would be my first all A's, ever, aha. I'd have to make up my health grade too, that's not doing so well. I have to get on those papers.
I would love to be in your mind, for one day. Peeling potatoes for no one? Really, who comes up with that? Ahaha, genius Auds, genius.
I am a fan of change, kind of. Well, it all depends on the situation. There are so, so, so many situations in this world.
If I had to choose independence or confidence, I would have no idea what to choose. Honestly, I hate decision making and I will not make one unless I am absolutely forced to. And I hate that. Independence or confidence? Huh, it's like the things are totally seperate but the more thought I put into it they go very hand-in-hand, kind of. I don't know!
That would be so crazy if it just happened, everyone had these death clocks now programmed for some reason. I really think I would like that better, really. Sure it would suck to know they were going to be gone tomorrow, but you could atleast have a chance before they go, you know? I'm so paranoid about people dying. Gar.
What if someone made a map of everyone in the entire world and connected it. Oh, that would be so awesome. That's probably not even possible, but maybe.
I want to go to Russia too. I'm thinking I need to go to Peru or something. I need to sleep on the beach and just get away to get my head cleared. Then again, leaving my problems like "couches in alleys" doesn't necessarily mean they will be taken away. I might have to go through the rain-soaked and rotten remains when I get home. That'll just be worse. Ah, how I love that analogy though. ("Couches in Alleys" - Styrofoam ft. Ben Gibbard)
I am ready for life.
I'm excited for tree decorating, Christmas, possibilities, and New Year's. I'm excited for plans and executing them, January 24th (three months are up) and I'm just excited becuase I feel like I can deal.
I am now going to shower, and hopfully do my Algebra homework without dying.
Here goes nothing!
AH, I HAVE TO WORK ON MY APUSH PAPER TOO! I have good information so far, really. Probably not 500 - 600 words worth, but still.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Don't you wish your little boy was cute as mine?
I stole the whole titling blogs after whatever song we are listening from you. This line just made me laugh, however.
I don't know how people would react if I gave them hugs like that. You could probably get away with it, though, because that is who you are. Isn't it weird how people are associated with things? Like, it could be normal for one person to say something, but if someone else said the exact same thing in the exact same circumstance, it wouldn't make any sense?
Everyone loves me, Abby. It is just something you will have to get used to.
That is such a weird sequence. It is especially strange that the numbers are in numeric order and are all multiples of nine except for one seven, though no nine times seven. They are all even except for twenty-seven. If you add the numbers of each, you would have the sequence 9-9-9-6. If you multiply them, you would have 8-14-18-8. If you multiply all of them you would end up with a final number of 734,832, which, if you add all of the digits up, comes to 27. If you add all of them together you would have 123, which further adds to six. It also multiplies to six. That was way too much fun. I probably shouldn't have enjoyed that.
Tomorrow, I have been instructed, is going to be the start of Game Wednesdays in homeroom. I am bringing Disney Trivial Pursuit. It should be joyous.
I actually hope my biography is published as well. I am curious as to how my grandparents will react. Or my mom. That could be interesting.
My awkward phone calls at the library are too numerous to count, truly. It was horrifying. I don't think I can ever return. "Hi this is Audrey and Brownsburg Public Library. We would like to invite you to a SURPRISE Open House..." AHH!!!
No, that gift definitely exceeded all standards previously established. Though I am sick of replying, "Thanks, it's Abby's" to EVERYthing.
I really hope it is an age thing. I hope that one day I will create my own well-thought-out opinions and be able to make constructive decisions. One day...
Your hair cut is not that bad. I hardly noticed today, but that could be because I was paying more attention to the grease bucket poured onto your head. That wasn't that bad either. I sincerely hope you aren't one of those people who doesn't want to tell me that my jokes are actually quite offensive. I would stop. Probably. You know I am kidding, I think.
I say we dye our hair without telling a single soul. I have always wanted to do that. I am honestly thinking about doing so anyday now. Complimentary colors? Like red and green? Oh, no...
You are not dumb, and never, ever say so ever again. B's are not bad. A lot of people would kill for B's. This time, however, you are going to get A's. It is just going to happen.
At least you are occupied with something worth your time. You aren't at home, say, peeling a ton of potatoes to not even eat. I'm not sure where that example came from.
You will become accustomed to the change, though I will openly admit I am not such a big fan of it. Independence versus confidence...hmmm...
Throwing you out into the ocean is an interesing idea. I don't even know, quite honestly; I haven't thought too much about it, I don't think. Wouldn't it be so crazy if eventually, everyone knew the day before they were going to die? Like, everbody would be calling each other and saying, "Well, it's my last day on earth...you wanna go see that new Keira Knightley film while I still have a chance?" Crazy!
It is weird to think that we are all insanely connected. Really. Someone in Russia could have the answers to all of my questions, and they think that it is so obvious that there is no need to share. They have no idea that some freak in the U.S. is thinking about them. I need to go to Russia.
I don't know how people would react if I gave them hugs like that. You could probably get away with it, though, because that is who you are. Isn't it weird how people are associated with things? Like, it could be normal for one person to say something, but if someone else said the exact same thing in the exact same circumstance, it wouldn't make any sense?
Everyone loves me, Abby. It is just something you will have to get used to.
That is such a weird sequence. It is especially strange that the numbers are in numeric order and are all multiples of nine except for one seven, though no nine times seven. They are all even except for twenty-seven. If you add the numbers of each, you would have the sequence 9-9-9-6. If you multiply them, you would have 8-14-18-8. If you multiply all of them you would end up with a final number of 734,832, which, if you add all of the digits up, comes to 27. If you add all of them together you would have 123, which further adds to six. It also multiplies to six. That was way too much fun. I probably shouldn't have enjoyed that.
Tomorrow, I have been instructed, is going to be the start of Game Wednesdays in homeroom. I am bringing Disney Trivial Pursuit. It should be joyous.
I actually hope my biography is published as well. I am curious as to how my grandparents will react. Or my mom. That could be interesting.
My awkward phone calls at the library are too numerous to count, truly. It was horrifying. I don't think I can ever return. "Hi this is Audrey and Brownsburg Public Library. We would like to invite you to a SURPRISE Open House..." AHH!!!
No, that gift definitely exceeded all standards previously established. Though I am sick of replying, "Thanks, it's Abby's" to EVERYthing.
I really hope it is an age thing. I hope that one day I will create my own well-thought-out opinions and be able to make constructive decisions. One day...
Your hair cut is not that bad. I hardly noticed today, but that could be because I was paying more attention to the grease bucket poured onto your head. That wasn't that bad either. I sincerely hope you aren't one of those people who doesn't want to tell me that my jokes are actually quite offensive. I would stop. Probably. You know I am kidding, I think.
I say we dye our hair without telling a single soul. I have always wanted to do that. I am honestly thinking about doing so anyday now. Complimentary colors? Like red and green? Oh, no...
You are not dumb, and never, ever say so ever again. B's are not bad. A lot of people would kill for B's. This time, however, you are going to get A's. It is just going to happen.
At least you are occupied with something worth your time. You aren't at home, say, peeling a ton of potatoes to not even eat. I'm not sure where that example came from.
You will become accustomed to the change, though I will openly admit I am not such a big fan of it. Independence versus confidence...hmmm...
Throwing you out into the ocean is an interesing idea. I don't even know, quite honestly; I haven't thought too much about it, I don't think. Wouldn't it be so crazy if eventually, everyone knew the day before they were going to die? Like, everbody would be calling each other and saying, "Well, it's my last day on earth...you wanna go see that new Keira Knightley film while I still have a chance?" Crazy!
It is weird to think that we are all insanely connected. Really. Someone in Russia could have the answers to all of my questions, and they think that it is so obvious that there is no need to share. They have no idea that some freak in the U.S. is thinking about them. I need to go to Russia.
Monday, December 3, 2007
While we are on the subject.
I am old friends with that saying by Ghandi. I've heard it several times but it never really inspired me. I get it, it makes sense. But have you ever wondered if maybe, possibly, what you really truly want, maybe we all want? Like what we want isn't really that different, it'd make more sense to me. I can see it too, but I don't know. You're giving me homework now, Auds? Oh, golly. My homework for you is to just everyday when someone makes you smile you have to hug them, ahaha. That would be amazing. I'm talking full-on hug, too. Grab them by the shirt and wrap them untill they ask you why you are hugging them. Then just smile and walk away. Will you please do that? I might even do that, aha.
It's not that I don't want you to be loved by my family, I just don't understand the affection they already feel for you when you've never even met them. Well, you have met my mom, but my Memaw? I just don't get it. They don't usually like many of my friends, or are very judgemntal. But you, nope. It's weird, aha.
I cannot even imagine life without the Blog anymore, and that's pretty sad, really. Kind of. We should publish it sometime. Forty-two is a cool number. I've always had the number sequence 18-27-36-42 in my head. I wonder what that means. A possible future lottery victory?
I really hope your biography is published. I don't think you understand how happy that would make me, aha. I would love it.
I really want to be on the Brownsburg Public Library calling list. I would convince you that you had the wrong number just to hear what you'd do. Oh, golly. An awkward moment with Auds. It's so weird. I haven't had one in months. I miss them, aha. Ah, well.
I hope you liked your surprise and that you didn't have your standards a lot higher. I tried the Christmas-y string to make it better, that you are now wearing as a bracelet.
I know I'm never going to know all of the answers, or probably half them, but I can't even form my own opinion. I feel almost too open-minded. Therefore not being able to define who I am. It's frustrating. I can always see both sides, and really I guess that's a good thing, but it's frustrating. We are all lost. Maybe it's an age thing. I mean, I really don't think you just hit a certain age and everything makes sense, but everything comes in time.
This funny hair cut is getting old. It'll grow pretty quickly though. I give it a month to be right where I started, aha.
I don't know if I'm ever really sure with anything I do.
I love Kanye's music, but not him. He has such an ego. I do feel sorry for him. It'd be really hard to lose your mom.
"Girl With the Purple Streak" could be relative. While I would be the original, you could be the new and improved, because purple was never my color. I don't like purple either. I'm glad you don't. It's just a weird color. We should get complimentary colors, Auds! My hair does need dyed again. Oh, the possibilities.
You have straight A's, Auds. I don't. I've had a couple C's from last year, and I had B's last quarter. Dumb! I'm trying, though. I'm not ready for this Latin exam at all, but I got some missing assignments in today. I'm catching up like no other, aha. McNeal will pull through. I would trust her with my life.
I will NOT be harshly let down, Auds, thank you very much. I am confident that Friday will be one of the best days of my life. What was I thinking when I took on ticket sales? Oh, well, aha. When I think about it, the school is overtaking my life. My life outside of it is getting smaller and smaller, but I kind of like it, aha. I am so, so EXCITED for this tree decorating.
I don't hate cleaning, oddly enough. I get stressed out when things are dirty. My room is very clean now. I like it this way, aha.
I'm actually re-thinking my opinion on forever-friendships, kind of. Like, I believe people enter and leave your life accordingly, but I never thought I just haven't had that really good of friends ever. That's changing though. And by loyal I meant that when people are my friends I take that seriously, if you can get what I'm saying. I don't know. I've had a weird life, but hey, I've been everywhere, and that gives me a little of everything. Things were meant to be, I suppose. Loyalty has nothing to do with time. I know I have the ability to be independent and confident, but those are too totally seperate things. I'm independent, but not all that confident. And sometimes, I'm really not that independent. I think I'm just in a weird transition state right now. Everything I'm used to is gradually changing, and while I know it's for the better, it's hard.
I never once said it doesn't get better! I'm a firm believer in that it always gets better. And sometimes, when you think you've hit bottom, you haven't, but hey, when you do, it only gets better. I would never tell anyone that something can't be fixed, or that it won't get better. No, that's something I really truly believe in.
That is genius! The guppy funeral, that is. I think I want to be shrunk and then flushed when I die, aha. Just the irony of it, ahah. It could be really symbolic but really I take it as a total joke, aha. Oh, that'd be good, aha. No, when I die I want to be thrown into the ocean, and that be in the end of it. I want my funeral to be fun though, aha. Ah, I don't want to die. I don't think I'll ever be ready to, but who's to say that. You know, I really did wish I had a one day's notice before I died. I wouldn't really try to avoid it, but I'd definitley put everything out there.
Yeah, maybe everyone is holding someone's answers. I like that. I also believe that you know, sometimes, when you are missing something, that other people hold that. You know how you get different feelings around different people? I love that. We are all here for each other, really. I wish more people could see that.
You messed up the labelings? How did this happen? Ah, well, I can fix them for you Friday.
I am going to go read, eat a Mexican pizza (I love those, so much!) and then do my homework, and probably call you when I begin to tackle Algebra. How fun! I am wearing the sweater you washed and it smells so good, aha. Really. Emma even said you smelled good, so it's not just me. And I figured out you didn't switch detergents. I hate the fact that I can figure these things out, aha. Only with you, Auds. Well, I'll probably be talking to you later. I wonder if we have anymore popsicles...
It's not that I don't want you to be loved by my family, I just don't understand the affection they already feel for you when you've never even met them. Well, you have met my mom, but my Memaw? I just don't get it. They don't usually like many of my friends, or are very judgemntal. But you, nope. It's weird, aha.
I cannot even imagine life without the Blog anymore, and that's pretty sad, really. Kind of. We should publish it sometime. Forty-two is a cool number. I've always had the number sequence 18-27-36-42 in my head. I wonder what that means. A possible future lottery victory?
I really hope your biography is published. I don't think you understand how happy that would make me, aha. I would love it.
I really want to be on the Brownsburg Public Library calling list. I would convince you that you had the wrong number just to hear what you'd do. Oh, golly. An awkward moment with Auds. It's so weird. I haven't had one in months. I miss them, aha. Ah, well.
I hope you liked your surprise and that you didn't have your standards a lot higher. I tried the Christmas-y string to make it better, that you are now wearing as a bracelet.
I know I'm never going to know all of the answers, or probably half them, but I can't even form my own opinion. I feel almost too open-minded. Therefore not being able to define who I am. It's frustrating. I can always see both sides, and really I guess that's a good thing, but it's frustrating. We are all lost. Maybe it's an age thing. I mean, I really don't think you just hit a certain age and everything makes sense, but everything comes in time.
This funny hair cut is getting old. It'll grow pretty quickly though. I give it a month to be right where I started, aha.
I don't know if I'm ever really sure with anything I do.
I love Kanye's music, but not him. He has such an ego. I do feel sorry for him. It'd be really hard to lose your mom.
"Girl With the Purple Streak" could be relative. While I would be the original, you could be the new and improved, because purple was never my color. I don't like purple either. I'm glad you don't. It's just a weird color. We should get complimentary colors, Auds! My hair does need dyed again. Oh, the possibilities.
You have straight A's, Auds. I don't. I've had a couple C's from last year, and I had B's last quarter. Dumb! I'm trying, though. I'm not ready for this Latin exam at all, but I got some missing assignments in today. I'm catching up like no other, aha. McNeal will pull through. I would trust her with my life.
I will NOT be harshly let down, Auds, thank you very much. I am confident that Friday will be one of the best days of my life. What was I thinking when I took on ticket sales? Oh, well, aha. When I think about it, the school is overtaking my life. My life outside of it is getting smaller and smaller, but I kind of like it, aha. I am so, so EXCITED for this tree decorating.
I don't hate cleaning, oddly enough. I get stressed out when things are dirty. My room is very clean now. I like it this way, aha.
I'm actually re-thinking my opinion on forever-friendships, kind of. Like, I believe people enter and leave your life accordingly, but I never thought I just haven't had that really good of friends ever. That's changing though. And by loyal I meant that when people are my friends I take that seriously, if you can get what I'm saying. I don't know. I've had a weird life, but hey, I've been everywhere, and that gives me a little of everything. Things were meant to be, I suppose. Loyalty has nothing to do with time. I know I have the ability to be independent and confident, but those are too totally seperate things. I'm independent, but not all that confident. And sometimes, I'm really not that independent. I think I'm just in a weird transition state right now. Everything I'm used to is gradually changing, and while I know it's for the better, it's hard.
I never once said it doesn't get better! I'm a firm believer in that it always gets better. And sometimes, when you think you've hit bottom, you haven't, but hey, when you do, it only gets better. I would never tell anyone that something can't be fixed, or that it won't get better. No, that's something I really truly believe in.
That is genius! The guppy funeral, that is. I think I want to be shrunk and then flushed when I die, aha. Just the irony of it, ahah. It could be really symbolic but really I take it as a total joke, aha. Oh, that'd be good, aha. No, when I die I want to be thrown into the ocean, and that be in the end of it. I want my funeral to be fun though, aha. Ah, I don't want to die. I don't think I'll ever be ready to, but who's to say that. You know, I really did wish I had a one day's notice before I died. I wouldn't really try to avoid it, but I'd definitley put everything out there.
Yeah, maybe everyone is holding someone's answers. I like that. I also believe that you know, sometimes, when you are missing something, that other people hold that. You know how you get different feelings around different people? I love that. We are all here for each other, really. I wish more people could see that.
You messed up the labelings? How did this happen? Ah, well, I can fix them for you Friday.
I am going to go read, eat a Mexican pizza (I love those, so much!) and then do my homework, and probably call you when I begin to tackle Algebra. How fun! I am wearing the sweater you washed and it smells so good, aha. Really. Emma even said you smelled good, so it's not just me. And I figured out you didn't switch detergents. I hate the fact that I can figure these things out, aha. Only with you, Auds. Well, I'll probably be talking to you later. I wonder if we have anymore popsicles...
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Snot Rags
Good ol' Ghandi said, "You must be the change you want to see in the world," or someting like that. I think you should analyze this and put it to everyday use, meaning compare it to your own life. That is your homework for me. Go!
Hah! 11! There you go, Abby. And not only did you go to sleep early, you slept late. I am amazed, I must say. I'm glad you enjoyed spending time with your grandmother. And I am overjoyed that she thinks I am sweet, despite your goal to make her believe otherwise. Can you not just let me be loved by someone? It is nice to be appreciated.
Happy one month anniversary to you, too. Ah, the blog. What was life like two months ago? Forty-two is kind of a cool number.
Today, I went to the library, expecting to only be there for about an hour. She told me that I would only have to make one or two pages of calls. Nope. She expected me to make two hundred and fifty calls. I only got through 150 of these before the library closed. Still, that is a lot of calls to make in that high pitched, "Hi, this is Audrey from Brownsburg Public Library," voice. Argh. I got hung up on more that once as well.
A surprise! I used to love surprises until my father started to use the term too loosely. Like, he would tell me that he had a surprise to bring home and it would end up being apples. Not that apples aren't good, but I was always expecting something more. That is the thing with surprised--I always seem to think it is going to be something far greater than what it usually is. I have lowered my standards for surprises, however, so I am sure yours will be just wonderful.
That was a LOT of question marks to use in only one paragraph. You are very confused, obviously. Aren't we all? I mean, we're never going to know all the answers, so we should just appreciate the fun in not knowing. Maybe we aren't given the answers so that we can figure out our own views of what is right and what is wrong, therefore defining ourselves. And then when we make a decision, we have thought it out so thoroughly that we are surer than if we were just handed the answers.
Ha, I like your shout out to Kanye. Poor guy.
Ahh! Hightlighter orange? I also appreciate your using of the term "pompadaur". That made me laugh for quite some time. I will never become the girl with the purple streak. That is you and will always be you, even if your hair is hightlighter orange. Plus, I have never been a big fan of purple, as it is Brownsburg's color, so I have gotten kind of sick of it. I am thinking more blue. Or green. Hmm...maybe highlighter yellow?
You'll get a scholarship, as long as you keep working. Though nothing is guaranteed. I always worry way too much about scholarships. I hope Mrs. Mcneal pulls through for us.
I don't think your hopes for this tree decorating should be this high, really. I am afraid that you will be harshly let down, and that would be too sad for me to handle. So go into thinking that it will be the dumbest experience ever. You can even say, "I can't believe I'm missing a party for this." Then, maybe, you will be amazed. But only then, sadly. Though I do love Christmas decorating.
Don't say you are going to clean your room because it makes me think that I should, and I hate cleaning with a passion. Really.
Loyal is such a strange word. Aren't you the one who doesn't believe in long-lasting friendship? And you are calling yourself loyal? I hope that doesn't seem mean. I really did not want it to. And I am not even in any hating of Abby mood. Really, it was not supposed to be negative, though it sounds that way. But what is loyalty? It is a word to describe dogs, not you, Abby. As much as I love dogs and believe in some level of equality between us and "animals", they are loyal because we guard them from being independent. You have the ability to be independent and have confidence on your own. Don't be such a dog.
Don't tell me it doesn't get better! I would like to believe it does.
I told you my sister's guppy died, but she didn't see it until yesterday. Though I was not there, I have been informed that its flushing included cinnamon, chocolate syrup, and Mountain Dew. She seriously put these items into the toilet with it. Isn't that genius? When I am cremated, I would like chocolate in my urn as well, though probably not syrup. That would make my ashes all sticky. These are strange thoughts...
I don't know. I am probably just as lost as you are. Maybe we are lost in different parts of the woods, so that we hold wisdom to the other's problems. I think everyone is like that. If you have a problem, someone out there has conquered it and is in search for the answers that you hold. That is why everyone should help each other out.
My favorites so far include (though this may be wrong because I apparently messed up on the labelings of these songs) "Oceans", "Young Folks", "Peach Plum Pear", "My Moon My Man", and "Penny on the Train Track". Though I have just begun.
Good-night Abby.
Hah! 11! There you go, Abby. And not only did you go to sleep early, you slept late. I am amazed, I must say. I'm glad you enjoyed spending time with your grandmother. And I am overjoyed that she thinks I am sweet, despite your goal to make her believe otherwise. Can you not just let me be loved by someone? It is nice to be appreciated.
Happy one month anniversary to you, too. Ah, the blog. What was life like two months ago? Forty-two is kind of a cool number.
Today, I went to the library, expecting to only be there for about an hour. She told me that I would only have to make one or two pages of calls. Nope. She expected me to make two hundred and fifty calls. I only got through 150 of these before the library closed. Still, that is a lot of calls to make in that high pitched, "Hi, this is Audrey from Brownsburg Public Library," voice. Argh. I got hung up on more that once as well.
A surprise! I used to love surprises until my father started to use the term too loosely. Like, he would tell me that he had a surprise to bring home and it would end up being apples. Not that apples aren't good, but I was always expecting something more. That is the thing with surprised--I always seem to think it is going to be something far greater than what it usually is. I have lowered my standards for surprises, however, so I am sure yours will be just wonderful.
That was a LOT of question marks to use in only one paragraph. You are very confused, obviously. Aren't we all? I mean, we're never going to know all the answers, so we should just appreciate the fun in not knowing. Maybe we aren't given the answers so that we can figure out our own views of what is right and what is wrong, therefore defining ourselves. And then when we make a decision, we have thought it out so thoroughly that we are surer than if we were just handed the answers.
Ha, I like your shout out to Kanye. Poor guy.
Ahh! Hightlighter orange? I also appreciate your using of the term "pompadaur". That made me laugh for quite some time. I will never become the girl with the purple streak. That is you and will always be you, even if your hair is hightlighter orange. Plus, I have never been a big fan of purple, as it is Brownsburg's color, so I have gotten kind of sick of it. I am thinking more blue. Or green. Hmm...maybe highlighter yellow?
You'll get a scholarship, as long as you keep working. Though nothing is guaranteed. I always worry way too much about scholarships. I hope Mrs. Mcneal pulls through for us.
I don't think your hopes for this tree decorating should be this high, really. I am afraid that you will be harshly let down, and that would be too sad for me to handle. So go into thinking that it will be the dumbest experience ever. You can even say, "I can't believe I'm missing a party for this." Then, maybe, you will be amazed. But only then, sadly. Though I do love Christmas decorating.
Don't say you are going to clean your room because it makes me think that I should, and I hate cleaning with a passion. Really.
Loyal is such a strange word. Aren't you the one who doesn't believe in long-lasting friendship? And you are calling yourself loyal? I hope that doesn't seem mean. I really did not want it to. And I am not even in any hating of Abby mood. Really, it was not supposed to be negative, though it sounds that way. But what is loyalty? It is a word to describe dogs, not you, Abby. As much as I love dogs and believe in some level of equality between us and "animals", they are loyal because we guard them from being independent. You have the ability to be independent and have confidence on your own. Don't be such a dog.
Don't tell me it doesn't get better! I would like to believe it does.
I told you my sister's guppy died, but she didn't see it until yesterday. Though I was not there, I have been informed that its flushing included cinnamon, chocolate syrup, and Mountain Dew. She seriously put these items into the toilet with it. Isn't that genius? When I am cremated, I would like chocolate in my urn as well, though probably not syrup. That would make my ashes all sticky. These are strange thoughts...
I don't know. I am probably just as lost as you are. Maybe we are lost in different parts of the woods, so that we hold wisdom to the other's problems. I think everyone is like that. If you have a problem, someone out there has conquered it and is in search for the answers that you hold. That is why everyone should help each other out.
My favorites so far include (though this may be wrong because I apparently messed up on the labelings of these songs) "Oceans", "Young Folks", "Peach Plum Pear", "My Moon My Man", and "Penny on the Train Track". Though I have just begun.
Good-night Abby.
My feet are so cold.
I have been wearing my non-waterproof moccasins. Mistake number one.
My grandma's was so nice. She picked me up and we went to Don Pablo's, and it was so good. I had the Chimi De Oro, and nachos, and I'm really hungry if you can't tell. Then we went to her house and I didn't do much but just read and then we played Scrabble and I beat her and that was fun. Then I went to bed around 11! I woke up at about 11 (I think that is quite possibly the longest I have ever slept, but it was needed?) and we went to the mall and to Arby's (Ah, so good...) and then we went to the new Barnes and Noble. I love it, so so much. It simply has everything. I wish I could just buy everything. I would.
HAPPY MONTH ANNIVERSARY OF OUR BLOG, BY THE WAY! Forty-two is a magic number. Kind of like 2:19.
Ahah, I know how to spell 'wrestle,' thank you very much. That's just how you have to say it. Wressellll. Is it not fun? It is. You have to slur it too. Wrass-ull. That is how it should be pronounced, thank you. I'm glad it made you happy. I'll give you a full page of random doodles to look at when you get down.
I have a surprise for you tomorrow! :]
How are we suppost to know what our best is, though? I always feel like I can do better, because I can. It's just frustrating. I don't know. Like, I want to give my all into something but I have no idea what my all is? But I'm already so tired, but the things I'm putting my energy into aren't really what they need to be put into? I could be doing better but I don't know what that is? But I don't want to be doing better things because the things I do connect me with people and I love people? AGH! I do believe my bed time will become more routinely early.
Christmas should be wonderful. It means snow and sledding, which I absolutely love. It means more time with my family, who (whom?) I love. It means hopefully once again seeing my baby cousin, who I will love. It means everything is better for just a little bit and everyone's in a lot better of mood. It also means really good food. I think my mind will alleviate itself for just a little bit, like a week before Chrismas. I will make it.
Well, maybe my concerto will just change everything, aha. It's a possibility. Everything is always a possibility. I don't really like that, though. Gar. Anyways, I'm glad "Peach Plum Pear" gave you some idea. I am excited to hear the final product.
If I knew how to develop a filter to stop everything that was going to stress me out, you know I would. I don't know how to not let things get to me. That's just not, I don't know, it's just not me? I put myself out there, and while I believe that's what I'm suppost to do, I often regret it. I would love a break, Auds. I wish I could just lay in a warm bed and not think and sleep, but that will get me nowhere. I've got packs to move. Thank you, Kanye West.
Okay, I'll get a bowl cut and dye it bright highlighter orange. Somedays I can wear it in a pompadaur and look like Ronald McDonald's cousin. YOU WANT TO DYE YOUR HAIR?!? Well, maybe it's not your whole heard but still it's a streak and this excites me to no end. Oh, the possibilities! YOU COULD BECOME THE GIRL WITH THE PURPLE STREAK! What is this, Auds? Oh, Lord. :]
I may be doing well, but like McNeal said, she can't get scholarships with C's. Who wants student loans? I found out my friend got a four thousand student loan and didn't even go to school. He just bought cameras and a website and clothes. I couldn't believe it. Sometimes, I just, don't know. I want to get a scholarship though. I want to be good enough for someone to pay me to go to their school. I think that is, well, cool. Who knows.
I just made Strawberries'N'Cream oatmeal. It's a little dry, and a little weird tasting, but good. Well, actually, just filling. I forgot to go to Rally's, and while it isn't even 8 o'clock yet, I need enough gas for school tomorrow. Gas prices are my public enemy number one.
I am excited to see the play. I've got my whole family coming, ahah. My grandma is excited to see "that sweetie" (being you) as ragpicker. I don't understand where you get this name. I'm pretty sure in every story I tell you are pretty negative. Just kidding! But, really, she just thinls you are the bee's knees and will be coming to the play on Friday. AND THEN TREE TIME! Ah, I am so psyched.
I don't know who Margot is to be honest. I don't think she is in the band. There is a girl, but I'm not sure if she is Margot. Developed any preference yet?
Well, confidence can be a decieving thing. Certain people just totally break it off of me, some people build on it. It's all about who I'm with and where. It's weird. I'm fickle, aha. But, I'm loyal, so maybe that isn't the right word. Lord knows. Well, I don't know. I think the people that break off my confidence aren't so appealing anymore and I'm kind of drifting away from them, and I don't know if that is or isn't a good thing. Like, I kind of want to, so I can stand confidently on my own two feet, but who says when that'll be. I want to get better but when I'll be able to take them on who says anyone will just got running back to how things used to be. I need to get things figured out, but I don't have time to and it's frustrating. I just want people to be happy so bad, but I know I need to get myself together but I don't exactly knwo what I want or what will make me happy. Well, I do, but things are so hard. I am just going on and on and I would give you details but I don't excactly know where it all starts and where it started ending or even what it all is about. So. I am just kind of wondering/wandering.
Yeah, not needing a meaningful New Year's would be a good thing, aha. I don't know what I'm going to do.
The Kite Runner is really harsh. I wish I could say it gets better. Just don't be mad at me, okay? It really is such a good book though.
I made a To Do list, that I'm thinking I will start working on as soon as I get done with this blog. The first thing on the list is througholy (spelling) cleaning my room.
You aee, I don't believe there are bad people. I just believe there are bad doings.
I always look at this thing. I've probably read every entry three times? Maybe more? It's like a little book, ahah.
It is up to our generation, really. I've seen so many older people basically say we are screwed, but I truly believe we can do something. We have to.
I'm glad you wanted your family, aha. It's a good thing, Auds. I know exactly what it feels like. I came home today and my little sister wasn't home and I was so crestfallen. She is home now though. She gets so annoyed with me, but really, she just means so much.
Ah, Auds, I might take you up on that head rub on Friday. If the damned Writer's Guild would go back to normal, it could be even sooner, but no. Really, it's good to know you truly care, aha. I'm sorry if you weren't expecting to be taken up on this offer, but since I will be in your warm bed on Friday, might as well kill two birds with one stone.
You know? Then tell me, tell me all about it. I feel uneducated and lost and I feel like I don't know anything. But I should, because I've seen a lot. I feel a lot. But, no, I don't know nothin'.
I am now going to througholy clean my room.
I'll be driving to school tomorrow so I don't need to get up untill like 9. Weird.
My grandma's was so nice. She picked me up and we went to Don Pablo's, and it was so good. I had the Chimi De Oro, and nachos, and I'm really hungry if you can't tell. Then we went to her house and I didn't do much but just read and then we played Scrabble and I beat her and that was fun. Then I went to bed around 11! I woke up at about 11 (I think that is quite possibly the longest I have ever slept, but it was needed?) and we went to the mall and to Arby's (Ah, so good...) and then we went to the new Barnes and Noble. I love it, so so much. It simply has everything. I wish I could just buy everything. I would.
HAPPY MONTH ANNIVERSARY OF OUR BLOG, BY THE WAY! Forty-two is a magic number. Kind of like 2:19.
Ahah, I know how to spell 'wrestle,' thank you very much. That's just how you have to say it. Wressellll. Is it not fun? It is. You have to slur it too. Wrass-ull. That is how it should be pronounced, thank you. I'm glad it made you happy. I'll give you a full page of random doodles to look at when you get down.
I have a surprise for you tomorrow! :]
How are we suppost to know what our best is, though? I always feel like I can do better, because I can. It's just frustrating. I don't know. Like, I want to give my all into something but I have no idea what my all is? But I'm already so tired, but the things I'm putting my energy into aren't really what they need to be put into? I could be doing better but I don't know what that is? But I don't want to be doing better things because the things I do connect me with people and I love people? AGH! I do believe my bed time will become more routinely early.
Christmas should be wonderful. It means snow and sledding, which I absolutely love. It means more time with my family, who (whom?) I love. It means hopefully once again seeing my baby cousin, who I will love. It means everything is better for just a little bit and everyone's in a lot better of mood. It also means really good food. I think my mind will alleviate itself for just a little bit, like a week before Chrismas. I will make it.
Well, maybe my concerto will just change everything, aha. It's a possibility. Everything is always a possibility. I don't really like that, though. Gar. Anyways, I'm glad "Peach Plum Pear" gave you some idea. I am excited to hear the final product.
If I knew how to develop a filter to stop everything that was going to stress me out, you know I would. I don't know how to not let things get to me. That's just not, I don't know, it's just not me? I put myself out there, and while I believe that's what I'm suppost to do, I often regret it. I would love a break, Auds. I wish I could just lay in a warm bed and not think and sleep, but that will get me nowhere. I've got packs to move. Thank you, Kanye West.
Okay, I'll get a bowl cut and dye it bright highlighter orange. Somedays I can wear it in a pompadaur and look like Ronald McDonald's cousin. YOU WANT TO DYE YOUR HAIR?!? Well, maybe it's not your whole heard but still it's a streak and this excites me to no end. Oh, the possibilities! YOU COULD BECOME THE GIRL WITH THE PURPLE STREAK! What is this, Auds? Oh, Lord. :]
I may be doing well, but like McNeal said, she can't get scholarships with C's. Who wants student loans? I found out my friend got a four thousand student loan and didn't even go to school. He just bought cameras and a website and clothes. I couldn't believe it. Sometimes, I just, don't know. I want to get a scholarship though. I want to be good enough for someone to pay me to go to their school. I think that is, well, cool. Who knows.
I just made Strawberries'N'Cream oatmeal. It's a little dry, and a little weird tasting, but good. Well, actually, just filling. I forgot to go to Rally's, and while it isn't even 8 o'clock yet, I need enough gas for school tomorrow. Gas prices are my public enemy number one.
I am excited to see the play. I've got my whole family coming, ahah. My grandma is excited to see "that sweetie" (being you) as ragpicker. I don't understand where you get this name. I'm pretty sure in every story I tell you are pretty negative. Just kidding! But, really, she just thinls you are the bee's knees and will be coming to the play on Friday. AND THEN TREE TIME! Ah, I am so psyched.
I don't know who Margot is to be honest. I don't think she is in the band. There is a girl, but I'm not sure if she is Margot. Developed any preference yet?
Well, confidence can be a decieving thing. Certain people just totally break it off of me, some people build on it. It's all about who I'm with and where. It's weird. I'm fickle, aha. But, I'm loyal, so maybe that isn't the right word. Lord knows. Well, I don't know. I think the people that break off my confidence aren't so appealing anymore and I'm kind of drifting away from them, and I don't know if that is or isn't a good thing. Like, I kind of want to, so I can stand confidently on my own two feet, but who says when that'll be. I want to get better but when I'll be able to take them on who says anyone will just got running back to how things used to be. I need to get things figured out, but I don't have time to and it's frustrating. I just want people to be happy so bad, but I know I need to get myself together but I don't exactly knwo what I want or what will make me happy. Well, I do, but things are so hard. I am just going on and on and I would give you details but I don't excactly know where it all starts and where it started ending or even what it all is about. So. I am just kind of wondering/wandering.
Yeah, not needing a meaningful New Year's would be a good thing, aha. I don't know what I'm going to do.
The Kite Runner is really harsh. I wish I could say it gets better. Just don't be mad at me, okay? It really is such a good book though.
I made a To Do list, that I'm thinking I will start working on as soon as I get done with this blog. The first thing on the list is througholy (spelling) cleaning my room.
You aee, I don't believe there are bad people. I just believe there are bad doings.
I always look at this thing. I've probably read every entry three times? Maybe more? It's like a little book, ahah.
It is up to our generation, really. I've seen so many older people basically say we are screwed, but I truly believe we can do something. We have to.
I'm glad you wanted your family, aha. It's a good thing, Auds. I know exactly what it feels like. I came home today and my little sister wasn't home and I was so crestfallen. She is home now though. She gets so annoyed with me, but really, she just means so much.
Ah, Auds, I might take you up on that head rub on Friday. If the damned Writer's Guild would go back to normal, it could be even sooner, but no. Really, it's good to know you truly care, aha. I'm sorry if you weren't expecting to be taken up on this offer, but since I will be in your warm bed on Friday, might as well kill two birds with one stone.
You know? Then tell me, tell me all about it. I feel uneducated and lost and I feel like I don't know anything. But I should, because I've seen a lot. I feel a lot. But, no, I don't know nothin'.
I am now going to througholy clean my room.
I'll be driving to school tomorrow so I don't need to get up untill like 9. Weird.
There is a Crumb of Something Unknown on my Pant Leg...
Woah. That was a long post. I am glad, however; it has been quite some time.
Forty-two posts for the month of November. That, my dear Abby, is crazy. One might even call it "insane". Yes, I think one just might.
I would just like to tell you that I have been typing in the titles of my songs from your CD, and all I had to do was look over at "wanna wressle?" (which I believe is spelled incorrectly, by the way) to make me feel overjoyed. It is nice to know that with all the horror of the world, little things can still make me happy.
No, I am sure that if you received an adequate amount of sleep, you would not always be tired. Well, your mind probably still would be, but it would certainly help. Your going to bed at one is an improvement. There is way too much to fix in the world, but you can't hang yourself over it. Knowing that you are doing the best you can and working to get others to join should be enough (though I know it never will be).
Having headaches is why you should start sleeping. Seriously. Christmas should be wonderful. It will be the first time I have seen my sister without her roommate (not that I am complaining) in a very, very long time. Excluding this weekend. I mean for an extended period of time.
"This" is something you will have to get used to. The frustration and confusing, vicious cycle is madness. I don't know what to tell you. I have no wisdom to offer. Just a cello concerto (by the way, I just listened to the fruit song, and I believe that they are plucking the strings, which would actually be pretty cool...thanks).
Quit letting everything drive you insane. You really do need a day off. I don't know how exactly I can tell you that after watching that documentary, but I think that you are an exception. Let me do the thinking for a couple of days, Abby. You just sleep. And watch movies that start with the letter "L".
Okay, bowl cut it is. Will you please dye it some insane color too? I really want to dye a colorful streak in my hair one of these days. You can be there when I make the final decision.
You are doing well in school, I think, so you should not be too overly frustrated with it. That does not mean to not worry about it. That is probably necessary.
The play shall be interesting--just you watch. Oh, gosh. I know you can't wait to see me as ragpicker. I will be the highlight of the show.
So is Margot of Margot and the Nuclear So-and-So's not a female. Because I was definitely expecting a female voice, but nope. Always a surprise on your CD's.
You seem way too confident to ever give in to peer pressure. I can't judge though. I would say that you do not seem like the type of person to succumb to others, but you just wrote about how others should not say that that was not very "you" because there cannot be a defined "you" in a lifetime, but a different "you" in every circumstance. So maybe I shouldn't say that. I can't say if you are getting "well, better?" because I don't know how you were before. You can spare me the details unless you feel the need to talk, but, anyway, I think you are a perfectly wonderful person now, Abby. I think you have always been, most likely, which sounds so extremely corny, but you couldn't have been so, errr, loving?, if you weren't good before. So don't say "better" because that implies "becoming good", and I know good people who do stupid things. And don't say "scholarly" becuase that isn't necessarily "good". I know many smart people who do not have much kindness inside of them. So, you see, Scrabble Girl? I'm not sure you possibly can. I'm not sure I understood this unbelievably long passage either, so I can't blame you if you cannot. But know that you are good. There is no way to convinve me otherwise.
New Year's is important. Some day, when I really need it, I will have a meaningful New Year's. Right now, though, I think that I would try too hard to make it important only to find that I don't need it, which I guess is a good thing.
I wanted to read all day today, but one, I was busy, and two, I was not sure I could handle the Kite Runner. Especially at this moment.
You loser, looking but not writing.
I hope we make change. I hope our generation is the one to make a difference. Really. Because the world is in great need of one.
Ha, I know. I bet they don't know what they are getting themselves into, creating a blog. I don't think we should warn them, because it truly is a spectacular universe.
I really, really wanted my little sister to be home last night. Or my older sister. Either. I think you are rubbing off on me. But neither we there, and I was quite pathetic, so i just gave up and tried to fall asleep to the sould of VH1, but that didn't happen.
Actually, Abby, I read that, and I truly believed that I actually would rub your head and let you sleep in my bed. If anyone is reading this, it is not entirely as creepy as it may seem. And Abby definitely started it. But, if you really needed a head rubbing, I would be here to do it because I truly care. I know that if I ever needed a scalp rubbing (which I don't think I will because I don't like people touching my head), you would be there for me. This paragraph is becoming slightly strange, as has this entire blog entry. I really must stop before I frighten myself.
Who knows? I know. What, exactly I am unsure. But I bet I know about it.
Have a wonderful time at your grandmother's house. I hope her water bed is warm.
Forty-two posts for the month of November. That, my dear Abby, is crazy. One might even call it "insane". Yes, I think one just might.
I would just like to tell you that I have been typing in the titles of my songs from your CD, and all I had to do was look over at "wanna wressle?" (which I believe is spelled incorrectly, by the way) to make me feel overjoyed. It is nice to know that with all the horror of the world, little things can still make me happy.
No, I am sure that if you received an adequate amount of sleep, you would not always be tired. Well, your mind probably still would be, but it would certainly help. Your going to bed at one is an improvement. There is way too much to fix in the world, but you can't hang yourself over it. Knowing that you are doing the best you can and working to get others to join should be enough (though I know it never will be).
Having headaches is why you should start sleeping. Seriously. Christmas should be wonderful. It will be the first time I have seen my sister without her roommate (not that I am complaining) in a very, very long time. Excluding this weekend. I mean for an extended period of time.
"This" is something you will have to get used to. The frustration and confusing, vicious cycle is madness. I don't know what to tell you. I have no wisdom to offer. Just a cello concerto (by the way, I just listened to the fruit song, and I believe that they are plucking the strings, which would actually be pretty cool...thanks).
Quit letting everything drive you insane. You really do need a day off. I don't know how exactly I can tell you that after watching that documentary, but I think that you are an exception. Let me do the thinking for a couple of days, Abby. You just sleep. And watch movies that start with the letter "L".
Okay, bowl cut it is. Will you please dye it some insane color too? I really want to dye a colorful streak in my hair one of these days. You can be there when I make the final decision.
You are doing well in school, I think, so you should not be too overly frustrated with it. That does not mean to not worry about it. That is probably necessary.
The play shall be interesting--just you watch. Oh, gosh. I know you can't wait to see me as ragpicker. I will be the highlight of the show.
So is Margot of Margot and the Nuclear So-and-So's not a female. Because I was definitely expecting a female voice, but nope. Always a surprise on your CD's.
You seem way too confident to ever give in to peer pressure. I can't judge though. I would say that you do not seem like the type of person to succumb to others, but you just wrote about how others should not say that that was not very "you" because there cannot be a defined "you" in a lifetime, but a different "you" in every circumstance. So maybe I shouldn't say that. I can't say if you are getting "well, better?" because I don't know how you were before. You can spare me the details unless you feel the need to talk, but, anyway, I think you are a perfectly wonderful person now, Abby. I think you have always been, most likely, which sounds so extremely corny, but you couldn't have been so, errr, loving?, if you weren't good before. So don't say "better" because that implies "becoming good", and I know good people who do stupid things. And don't say "scholarly" becuase that isn't necessarily "good". I know many smart people who do not have much kindness inside of them. So, you see, Scrabble Girl? I'm not sure you possibly can. I'm not sure I understood this unbelievably long passage either, so I can't blame you if you cannot. But know that you are good. There is no way to convinve me otherwise.
New Year's is important. Some day, when I really need it, I will have a meaningful New Year's. Right now, though, I think that I would try too hard to make it important only to find that I don't need it, which I guess is a good thing.
I wanted to read all day today, but one, I was busy, and two, I was not sure I could handle the Kite Runner. Especially at this moment.
You loser, looking but not writing.
I hope we make change. I hope our generation is the one to make a difference. Really. Because the world is in great need of one.
Ha, I know. I bet they don't know what they are getting themselves into, creating a blog. I don't think we should warn them, because it truly is a spectacular universe.
I really, really wanted my little sister to be home last night. Or my older sister. Either. I think you are rubbing off on me. But neither we there, and I was quite pathetic, so i just gave up and tried to fall asleep to the sould of VH1, but that didn't happen.
Actually, Abby, I read that, and I truly believed that I actually would rub your head and let you sleep in my bed. If anyone is reading this, it is not entirely as creepy as it may seem. And Abby definitely started it. But, if you really needed a head rubbing, I would be here to do it because I truly care. I know that if I ever needed a scalp rubbing (which I don't think I will because I don't like people touching my head), you would be there for me. This paragraph is becoming slightly strange, as has this entire blog entry. I really must stop before I frighten myself.
Who knows? I know. What, exactly I am unsure. But I bet I know about it.
Have a wonderful time at your grandmother's house. I hope her water bed is warm.
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Exhausted.
I think that's the only way to describe how I feel at the moment. Totally exhausted. Like, I'm always tired. Even if I got enough sleep, it's like I just wake up tired because I know how much I have to do and what all is wrong with the world. It sucks. Like, it's motivating to hope that we can change things, but it's just that, hope. I know I am being completely cynical but it's just all I've felt lately. I'm trying to be more optimistic but something always happens. Gar.
Okay, so, on your Christmas CD, it isn't the last track that's my favorite. I'm just going to have to listen to it soon and tell you because I simply have no idea what order the tracks are in anymore.
This year has gone by so quickly. The weeks aren't even going slow anymore. I never feel like "Oh my Lord, it's only Monday?" I'm always like "WHEN DID THE LAST WEEK END?!?" It's so frustrating! I think Winter Break is going to be very nice and needed. I wish I could just stop thinking for like an hour. I have almost a constant headache. It's frustrating. It's just all there. I know I'm complaining too. I hate it. Ah, it's all so contradicting but truthful and it is so frustrating. What is this?
I am horrible at letting things "be." I don't think it is possible for me to do that. I'm always thinking about it and worrying and thinking, thinking, thinking. My head is driving me insnae. Life is driving me insane. Everyone is insane, I believe. Well, I mean, there's definitley potential.
You really aren't awkward at all anymore. It's weird, aha.
I want a bowl cut so bad, seriously. What's wrong with having a funny haircut? It'll bring joy to people's day. And to make it better, I'll take it completely serious. I just really want to do this. That and I want to shave my head. I really think it'd make things so much easier. My hair is getting so long (for me). It's frustrating, and always in my face. Oh, Lord.
I wish I didn't need a job. I've got a lot of planning to do this weekend, speaking of. I'm thinking about asking the Urban Times if I can intern there, maybe.
I really have to remember to call you Cello Girl. Ahhah, it sounds just so lame... I mean perfect.
You will do just fine on my concerto, Auds. I'm convinced. Not even convinced, I just know. I'm excited to hear it, really. I hate working hard on something and it just doesn't work. That's why I get so frustrated at school, aha. Speaking of which, I had my second dress down day this whole year, thanks to you. What is this, keeping me in iine? It cracks me up. Who knows, maybe someday I'll be going to bed at 11, maybe 12...
I think I will love Moulin Rouge, really. It'll be impossible not to, with you right there. I'm excited for our L Movie Marathon/Decorating The Tree! Really, ecstatic. GAH! You just have no idea.
How is the play going to be?
I am really done being bad. It's not even appealing at all, never really was. Peer pressure was a big part of it, but it was definitley me making the final decision, but I'm definitley getting, well, better? I don't know what the word is, really. More scholarly? Ahaha, don't know. What is this, Auds?
Really, this New Year is going to be well thought out and planned and it's going to be a beautiful thing. Really. It's going to affect me and not be empty. I'm actually pretty excited. I like New Year's, a lot. It's about time to get a fresh start. I know nothing really changes, but you get the incentive to, and that's important. Well, atleast to me.
Tonight I am going to sit out by my Christmas tree and read and fall asleep on the couch and be comfortable. Jobeth did come over but left because her parents didn't let her spend the night, but we played Scrabble and that got my mind off of Invisible Children (which I feel totally guilty for trying not to think about, but I need it in steps, that movie, just, well, hard-hitting...) but we played that and talked about books and like you said, I just need to sleep. Tomorrow I will fill it with actions, but tonight, I will rest. It's nice to be home. I am going to my grandma's tomorrow night. Her house is the best getaway, ever. I love it.
I can't believe I haven't written in the Blog since Tuesday, but yet I've looked at it everyday. I write down things to put in here but then I just have been so busy. Mr. McNeal gave me the advertising job for the play. Why did I take this on? I have enough, but I have the worst time ever saying no to people, it's ridiculous.
It's really okay that you were saddened. It's better than scoffing at it and claiming it to be a scam or something (Oh, that kills me...). It's just so horrible, and terrifying. I just can't grasp it. It makes me feel so stupid. Like I have so much. Gar. Actions will be taken. Things will get better, they have to. And we will help, Auds. The Twenty Years War will end, okay? Eyes have been opened and with what they've seen how can you close them? You can't. We cannot forget about this, and we won't. We will make change, Auds.
I know I'm not a bad driver. You only made me nervous because I didn't want you to be nervous, aha.
I really hope you like the CD's.
I am glad our Blogiverse is expanding. I hope they are aware of how addicting it is. And how they will be constantly checking it and making references. Oh, Lordy.
I just want to hug my little sister for as long as humanly possible. She's just so purposeful, if that makes any sense.
I am sad my bed is so cold, and yet kids are sleeping in a flooded hospital basement right now. I am ridicious. I really just want somone to wrap me up right now though. Like I just want to cuddle into someone the whole night and have them rub my head, aha. I'm thinking about showing up to your bed, even though I know you wouldn't let me near your stomach and your hands would never touch my head, I atleast know your bed is warm.
You aren't over-bearing. Not at all, really. So stop thinking that. I am going to bed, really. 1 AM on a Friday night. This is new. I'm going to bed before I do on school nights. Insane. What is all this? I just, golly.
Who knows.
Good night, Auds.
Okay, so, on your Christmas CD, it isn't the last track that's my favorite. I'm just going to have to listen to it soon and tell you because I simply have no idea what order the tracks are in anymore.
This year has gone by so quickly. The weeks aren't even going slow anymore. I never feel like "Oh my Lord, it's only Monday?" I'm always like "WHEN DID THE LAST WEEK END?!?" It's so frustrating! I think Winter Break is going to be very nice and needed. I wish I could just stop thinking for like an hour. I have almost a constant headache. It's frustrating. It's just all there. I know I'm complaining too. I hate it. Ah, it's all so contradicting but truthful and it is so frustrating. What is this?
I am horrible at letting things "be." I don't think it is possible for me to do that. I'm always thinking about it and worrying and thinking, thinking, thinking. My head is driving me insnae. Life is driving me insane. Everyone is insane, I believe. Well, I mean, there's definitley potential.
You really aren't awkward at all anymore. It's weird, aha.
I want a bowl cut so bad, seriously. What's wrong with having a funny haircut? It'll bring joy to people's day. And to make it better, I'll take it completely serious. I just really want to do this. That and I want to shave my head. I really think it'd make things so much easier. My hair is getting so long (for me). It's frustrating, and always in my face. Oh, Lord.
I wish I didn't need a job. I've got a lot of planning to do this weekend, speaking of. I'm thinking about asking the Urban Times if I can intern there, maybe.
I really have to remember to call you Cello Girl. Ahhah, it sounds just so lame... I mean perfect.
You will do just fine on my concerto, Auds. I'm convinced. Not even convinced, I just know. I'm excited to hear it, really. I hate working hard on something and it just doesn't work. That's why I get so frustrated at school, aha. Speaking of which, I had my second dress down day this whole year, thanks to you. What is this, keeping me in iine? It cracks me up. Who knows, maybe someday I'll be going to bed at 11, maybe 12...
I think I will love Moulin Rouge, really. It'll be impossible not to, with you right there. I'm excited for our L Movie Marathon/Decorating The Tree! Really, ecstatic. GAH! You just have no idea.
How is the play going to be?
I am really done being bad. It's not even appealing at all, never really was. Peer pressure was a big part of it, but it was definitley me making the final decision, but I'm definitley getting, well, better? I don't know what the word is, really. More scholarly? Ahaha, don't know. What is this, Auds?
Really, this New Year is going to be well thought out and planned and it's going to be a beautiful thing. Really. It's going to affect me and not be empty. I'm actually pretty excited. I like New Year's, a lot. It's about time to get a fresh start. I know nothing really changes, but you get the incentive to, and that's important. Well, atleast to me.
Tonight I am going to sit out by my Christmas tree and read and fall asleep on the couch and be comfortable. Jobeth did come over but left because her parents didn't let her spend the night, but we played Scrabble and that got my mind off of Invisible Children (which I feel totally guilty for trying not to think about, but I need it in steps, that movie, just, well, hard-hitting...) but we played that and talked about books and like you said, I just need to sleep. Tomorrow I will fill it with actions, but tonight, I will rest. It's nice to be home. I am going to my grandma's tomorrow night. Her house is the best getaway, ever. I love it.
I can't believe I haven't written in the Blog since Tuesday, but yet I've looked at it everyday. I write down things to put in here but then I just have been so busy. Mr. McNeal gave me the advertising job for the play. Why did I take this on? I have enough, but I have the worst time ever saying no to people, it's ridiculous.
It's really okay that you were saddened. It's better than scoffing at it and claiming it to be a scam or something (Oh, that kills me...). It's just so horrible, and terrifying. I just can't grasp it. It makes me feel so stupid. Like I have so much. Gar. Actions will be taken. Things will get better, they have to. And we will help, Auds. The Twenty Years War will end, okay? Eyes have been opened and with what they've seen how can you close them? You can't. We cannot forget about this, and we won't. We will make change, Auds.
I know I'm not a bad driver. You only made me nervous because I didn't want you to be nervous, aha.
I really hope you like the CD's.
I am glad our Blogiverse is expanding. I hope they are aware of how addicting it is. And how they will be constantly checking it and making references. Oh, Lordy.
I just want to hug my little sister for as long as humanly possible. She's just so purposeful, if that makes any sense.
I am sad my bed is so cold, and yet kids are sleeping in a flooded hospital basement right now. I am ridicious. I really just want somone to wrap me up right now though. Like I just want to cuddle into someone the whole night and have them rub my head, aha. I'm thinking about showing up to your bed, even though I know you wouldn't let me near your stomach and your hands would never touch my head, I atleast know your bed is warm.
You aren't over-bearing. Not at all, really. So stop thinking that. I am going to bed, really. 1 AM on a Friday night. This is new. I'm going to bed before I do on school nights. Insane. What is all this? I just, golly.
Who knows.
Good night, Auds.
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